0:01

In spite of what you have heard,

0:03

we're at the height of our powers,

0:05

atop the tallest of towers. We'll stay

0:07

here, we'll never stop, we'll take my

0:09

hand if you trust, that we will

0:11

do what we must, until it's turning

0:13

out just like a plan. We've

0:16

been away so long, it's long,

0:18

but our mojo is strong, and

0:20

unless I'm wrong, and I'm not,

0:23

we're at the height of our

0:25

powers. Today

0:54

marks the 20 year anniversary of the

0:56

last reported sighting of the Greenback Guardians.

0:59

Seen defending the streets of River City

1:02

from the volatile pairing of criminals and

1:04

crime. Even after many other

1:06

animal teams have taken up their mission to keep

1:08

the people of this city safe following

1:10

the convergence of 2010, has

1:13

any team truly been able to fill the

1:15

void that the Guardians left behind? The

1:18

citizens of River City say

1:20

no. But tonight,

1:22

those same citizens may sleep a little

1:24

easier. River City has

1:26

unveiled a shining tribute to heroism. Four

1:29

statues in the shape of those beloved

1:32

Greenback Guardians themselves, Lamar,

1:34

Loveless, Newton, and

1:36

Carver, all lovingly rendered

1:38

in ten foot tall golden glory

1:41

and keeping eternal watch over the city

1:43

streets to the north, south,

1:46

east, and west. The

1:49

monument is a new permanent addition to

1:51

River City's famous entry pavilion and

1:53

celebrates not only the heroes of yesteryear,

1:56

but the opening night of the History

1:58

of Heroes exhibition in the meantime. Museum's

2:00

West Wing Wing, sponsored by

2:02

Heron Sorkin. The

2:05

History of Heroes exhibition runs for the

2:07

next three months and celebrates the battles

2:09

of good versus evil in River City,

2:12

from villains like the Calcugator and

2:14

Shocktopus to heroes like Omega Mouse

2:16

and Jeremy the Badger Man. But

2:19

the true highlight of the collection? An

2:21

array of Greenback Guardians memorabilia that

2:24

includes their original signature weapons, an

2:26

unseen cut of their TV pilot,

2:28

and archival footage of their most

2:30

famous rescues and victories. I

2:33

have to say that I, for one, feel

2:35

a little safer knowing that while the Guardians

2:37

are gone they will always be with us

2:39

in spirit. Coming up

2:41

after the break, it started as a

2:43

simple school trip to the beach, but

2:45

what happened next? We'll bring

2:48

you the hilarious ending to that tragic

2:50

tale. Reporting for River

2:52

City First News, I'm JJ

2:54

August. JJ's safe out there. The

3:02

newscast transitions to the station's call letters

3:04

and then ads begin to roll. We

3:07

pull back from the TV display in

3:10

the window of Brody's Discount Television Wonder

3:12

Emporium and make our way down a

3:14

side street of River City. Several

3:17

hours have passed since JJ's broadcast

3:19

first aired and the city sleeps.

3:22

But this slumber is not entirely peaceful.

3:26

We return once again to the Arthur

3:28

Gallery Museum and find it shrouded in

3:30

darkness. The streetlights on either

3:32

side of the entry pavilion have been

3:34

tampered with, the panels cut open and

3:37

the wires chewed through. It

3:39

seems that someone is up to no good.

3:42

The bunny brood are robbing the museum.

3:46

Flopsy and Mopsy stand at the

3:48

top of the steps, directing henchmen

3:50

carrying boxes labeled greenback guardian stuff

3:52

towards a box truck. We

3:55

see cottontail separate from the others chewing

3:57

on the legs of the guardian statues.

4:00

But we also see one more thing. Across

4:03

the parking lot, taking cover behind

4:05

a sensible green sedan, we

4:07

see three abnormal heroes. My

4:11

first and past most important question, whose

4:14

sensible green sedan is it? Which one

4:17

of you three owns the

4:19

sensible green sedan? My

4:21

guy owns a Cybertruck. He's way

4:24

into that life. Oh

4:26

boy. Way into that Cybertruck lifestyle. What

4:28

an amazing way to introduce your character.

4:31

Ha ha ha! Can

4:34

I say- You never get a heel turn

4:36

at the very beginning of a natural play

4:38

podcast. Can I say brief

4:41

sidebar, Huntington has its first Cybertruck

4:43

and it is a citywide panic,

4:45

trying to figure out who has

4:47

the Cybertruck. It's all anybody's talking

4:50

about here. It's which dork bought

4:52

a Cybertruck? You know what? Two,

4:54

I do wanna say, two independent

4:56

parties came to Sydney to ask

4:58

if I was the culprit. That's

5:01

iron cold, man. That is like

5:03

my brand is so bad, apparently.

5:06

So does the green

5:08

sedan belong to Roger or

5:10

to Lyle? I

5:16

think it's messed up that you didn't even offer it to me.

5:18

I don't actually own a Cybertruck. You just said you didn't own

5:20

it. You said you had a Cybertruck. I don't have a Cybertruck

5:22

that was created. I think it would be Roger's if

5:27

it's part of his cover as

5:29

a competitive ballroom dancer. I

5:32

don't think Roger would drive a

5:34

sedan. It's like in the movies

5:37

where they put him in some junky car and

5:39

it's hilariously. This is cool, Trav.

5:41

We've never introduced a character by

5:44

saying what they aren't. That's such

5:46

an interesting diversion. I think you've

5:48

got an Aston Martin back

5:50

in the beach house. I

5:53

like the idea of Roger just constantly telling

5:55

people he has an Aston Martin, but he

5:58

can't ever drive it. While

8:00

you have any idea?

8:03

Three taps. There

8:07

must be something. Are

8:09

you- Remind me three, man. Are

8:13

you wanting us to split up?

8:16

No, I mean, maybe if that's

8:19

what the situation commands, but three

8:21

taps for three bogeys, then

8:24

pushing the head down, discretion.

8:27

When I point with the fin, it's pointing at

8:29

the direction of the bogeys. Yes. And

8:33

then- Oh, yeah, yeah. And then this

8:35

is just, and I brush my face, discretion. Oh,

8:38

I see. Yes. Always, man.

8:40

I asked you guys if you felt comfortable with

8:42

the hand symbols. Well, I know, but we didn't

8:44

want to appear

8:47

difficult. You seem so proud of them, man. I don't

8:49

know if us wanted a harsh it. Yeah, that was,

8:51

you were, you had this

8:53

glow while you were describing them in

8:56

our previous meeting. It

8:59

was very hard to disrupt. Okay,

9:02

so I brush my face again, three

9:04

taps, thumbs up. Wait,

9:07

now the thumbs up. Hold

9:10

on a second, about the thumbs up. Where are

9:12

we at with that? I

9:14

just kind of shake my head and I do a little

9:16

somersault roll. I'm going to try to sneak up towards the

9:18

fountain. Now the head shake. Okay,

9:22

you're sneaking up towards the fountain. Let's

9:24

see. Yeah, I want to get

9:26

into the fountain splash down and sort of

9:28

do an aquatic approach, Rambo style. Okay,

9:30

give me a just

9:33

straight two D8. I'm

9:36

going to say this is an abs roll because seals

9:38

I don't think are inherently sneaky.

9:41

No, once we get in the water though, Oh

9:44

yeah. it's remaining the shade. That's a three, but

9:46

then an eight, which is the highest number you

9:48

can roll on an eight sided dice. Okay, yes,

9:50

that is going to be a success, but, Okay.

9:53

So you are able to sneak over

9:55

there. Yeah. And you're trying

9:58

to make it to the fountain, correct? Yes, I'm trying. trying

10:00

to make it to sort of the south side of the fountain here. Far

10:02

away from the foes. In

10:05

the rules of this game, the success

10:07

butt appears above you. If you get

10:09

it. Yeah. It's humiliating. It makes a

10:12

success. You are able to do it,

10:14

but you're hidden, right? You're not spotted.

10:17

But it makes a little bit more

10:19

noise than maybe you were anticipating, maybe

10:21

you were going for it. So, Cottontail

10:24

has paused their chewing on the legs

10:26

of the statue, and they're a little

10:28

more aware now. Can

10:30

I have my control of my token, please? In

10:33

rule 20? Oh, yeah. I don't... Oh,

10:36

man. Gimme. Gimme the toy,

10:38

Trav. Damn, you

10:40

got to... Look at that. We all got little

10:42

toys down here, but you won't let us play

10:44

with them. I can do controlled by... Set me

10:46

loose. Set me free. Yeah. Let

10:50

him clear his door. Don't make me take that control away.

10:53

Whoa, he's spinning around. He's going

10:55

crazy, guys. Griffin. I'll take

10:57

the control away. I'll take the control away. You're

10:59

right. Okay, what are the

11:01

other two of you doing? I

11:03

would like to activate my nocturno sense.

11:05

Oh, okay. In a darkened environment and

11:07

when not an active peril, Lyle can

11:10

use sound and chemical detection to understand

11:12

more about his environment, enemies, etc. Okay,

11:14

what are you trying to determine? I'm

11:17

trying to determine places

11:21

where I might not be seen, like

11:23

cones of vision, that kind of thing.

11:25

Okay, excellent. And also

11:27

any... Big

11:29

glowing weak points on their backs. Yeah, I

11:31

was going to say weak points, but explosive

11:34

barrels? That's probably not... You

11:36

know what I mean? Just incontinent venture stuff. Travis, I

11:38

do just want to say, if you do put explosive

11:40

barrels in the first encounter of your campaign,

11:44

we're going to expect them in

11:46

all of them. Lyle has an

11:48

ability to... He's exceptionally skilled at

11:50

improvising melee weapons in his

11:52

environment, so he gets his weapons around

11:54

him. So I need to kind of know what

11:57

I have at my disposal. Okay, excellent. Roll 4d8.

12:02

Yeah. Okay. 4D8,

12:06

not 48. A

12:08

man. My nocturno sense goes wild with an 8, 7, 5,

12:10

5. All passes.

12:12

Yeah, that's perfect. Okay, yeah. First,

12:14

you can see that along the

12:16

side of the road closest to

12:18

you, there are some vehicles

12:21

parked probably, you know, maybe curtsy

12:23

vehicles from the museum or a

12:25

transport that they use. And

12:27

so that's going to give you some pretty good cover

12:30

to get up pretty far along the line.

12:33

But you can also see just ahead

12:35

of you in kind of the garden,

12:37

you can see the like greenery and

12:39

landscaping area. It seems that they

12:41

were kind of in the middle of redoing some stuff.

12:44

So you can see that the landscapers have left

12:46

behind sets of shovels and some like rakes and

12:50

hedge trimmers and stuff like that. A leaf

12:52

blower even. Okay. And what

12:54

kind of enemies do we have? We've

12:56

gone to seeing the three bunny brood

12:58

who are, you know, about like pretty

13:00

tall, ranging between like 5'10 and 6'5 bunny

13:03

people. Those

13:06

are bipedal rabbit men, yes? Correct.

13:08

Excellent, great. As well as their

13:10

three henchmen who just seem like pretty

13:12

standard dudes. Human dudes?

13:15

Yeah. Okay. And

13:17

then just your run of the mill. What's

13:19

a normal, Trev? What's a normal dude? Describe

13:22

a normal average dude to me. Me.

13:26

And then interesting. That's so fascinating to me. But

13:28

not surprising. That's not a bit about you. Speaks

13:30

volumes. They have different facial hair though, so you

13:32

can tell the difference. Cool dude. Yeah.

13:36

Oh, and they're all wearing fake bunny ears

13:38

to indicate their leech. Oh, that's good shit.

13:41

That's a good henchman move. And they

13:43

each have little cotton balls glued onto their

13:45

butts. Aww. Yeah.

13:49

All right, I'm going to use the

13:51

right side outside the line of cars

13:54

there to move up closer

13:57

in a discreet way. and

14:01

maybe grab myself a rake. Okay,

14:03

yeah, and with all those successes,

14:06

you are able to navigate that

14:08

incredibly easily, and you've got your

14:11

rake. I'm going to say you're

14:13

up, yeah, right about there, right by the streetlight east.

14:16

Okay, what about you, Roger? Roger

14:18

is going to rely on his

14:20

natural dancing skills

14:23

and just make a beeline

14:25

for which one of them is gnawing on

14:27

the legs of the statues. That

14:29

would be Cottontail. Cottontail. Pretending to

14:32

be a mime. No

14:34

good stuff? You know, relying on

14:37

his natural, you know, he's going to be pretending

14:39

to be a street performer, a mime. Oh, okay,

14:41

got it. And he's doing the old pulling

14:44

yourself along with a rope.

14:46

That will be very distracting. Excellent job,

14:48

man. Super job. Do

14:51

you maybe want to go around the other side of the

14:53

street than the one we are on? Let's

14:56

not be too hasty. I think dad's

14:58

got a plan and I think- To

15:00

draw attention directly to where the two of us

15:02

are hiding. Yeah, you got it, dad. Just go

15:04

to a different place to see your dad. I'm

15:07

going about halfway between. That way I can distract

15:09

for both of you. Okay. How

15:13

close can I get to him? Well,

15:15

that's a great question. Now they're just kind of looking at both of

15:17

us. We're in both

15:20

their periphery now. That's awesome. Yeah,

15:22

a bold choice, dad, to go ahead and

15:24

move yourself up there. I'm going to have

15:26

you- Oh, okay. Sorry. This is, I would

15:28

say, movement is your strong

15:31

suit, right? So go ahead and roll 3d8

15:33

for me. A

15:37

one, an eight, and a

15:39

one. Okay, yeah. I'm going to

15:41

say that with that kind of mixed success, you

15:43

are able to move up and

15:45

cotton tail does not immediately

15:48

attack. Cotton tail is not the

15:50

brightest of the three, but cotton

15:53

tail is going to move to kind of meet

15:55

you in the center. And

15:57

like is investigating.

18:00

man position there. I'll see what Navy's doing

18:02

first. Um, I want to approach a

18:04

little bit up the fountain just so I can get a better

18:06

look. I want to get an idea of how much they

18:09

have already stolen, what part of the heist process

18:11

it looks like we're in, if it looks like

18:13

these are going to peel off and go back

18:15

in to grab more stuff or if

18:17

they are about to make their getaway. Okay,

18:20

as we established in

18:22

the water, I'm going to say you don't

18:24

even for this lights off,

18:26

no one's paying attention to you, you're

18:28

in the water. It's so easy

18:30

for you to get close to there, but do

18:33

give me, um, give

18:35

me, yeah, just a 2d8 check to see

18:37

if you can scope out how it's going.

18:39

I do have a skill bug eyed.

18:43

Ross seals have gigantic eyeballs

18:45

that enhance Navy's powers of perception.

18:48

Oh sick. Okay. Yeah. Give me a 3d8. Double

18:53

success 7 to 7. Okay.

18:55

Yeah. So at this point,

18:58

the truck is pretty loaded. Okay.

19:01

You can see lots of boxes in

19:03

there and you can overhear a little

19:05

bit. Maybe like you see them talking

19:07

like flopsies starting to give some congratulatory

19:09

like thumbs up like, Hey, we're almost

19:11

done. Good job everybody. So

19:13

you can tell like it's starting to wrap

19:15

up. You don't have long hair. And I

19:18

want to remind you, Lyle, especially

19:20

where you are now next to this

19:22

street light, you can see like

19:24

the panel that was pulled off to access the

19:26

wires inside and you can see

19:29

like where they've been nod through and it's

19:31

pretty like green wire is cut and

19:33

there's a green wire, you know, underneath the red

19:35

wires, right? So it wouldn't be

19:37

hard to figure out like how to wire

19:39

these back together. Wire

19:43

the street light back together or wire the alarm

19:45

system back together. What is the panel? Panel

19:48

goes with the street light. The alarm system you assume is inside,

19:51

but they don't for maybe obvious

19:53

reasons give access to the alarm

19:55

system outside of the building.

19:57

Yeah, that's that cool. That's the building that

19:59

makes Perfect, that makes perfect sense,

20:01

Trev. I should've gotten that through context

20:04

clues, for sure. I

20:06

mean, I'm ready to pop this thing off. I don't know if you

20:09

guys are feeling like

20:11

this is good. Yeah, this is good. I'll

20:17

push the street light over.

20:20

Okay. Onto the red one. Onto

20:23

Mopsy, I can't see that name. Yeah,

20:26

Mopsy, it looks like that would work. So I'm gonna do that.

20:29

And then you can play it off like an accident, like

20:32

a final destination, whoopsie. Bad. What

20:34

are you using to do this? Is there

20:36

any skills you have? Yeah, Trev,

20:38

I'm using a rake. You're using a rake.

20:40

I said I grabbed it earlier, so I'm

20:42

using that as a lever to make it

20:44

easier. Okay. With my incredible strength.

20:47

So I'm picturing this correctly. You're wedging

20:49

like the rake and a shovel. Not

20:52

a rake, a shovel. Let's be sensible

20:54

men. It's a shovel. Okay.

20:57

Well, now I get it. Okay. Now

21:00

you get it. I'm using the tip of

21:02

it underneath the bolts, and I'm knocking

21:05

it over with that, with my

21:07

incredible strength. Okay, give me a

21:09

3D8 strength jack assisted by your

21:11

shovel. Two,

21:15

one, six. Yeah, so I will

21:17

say that with a six that

21:19

makes success, you are able to

21:22

get it going. Yeah.

21:25

It is making a fairly loud

21:28

noise as it goes. Yeah. Yeah.

21:31

So it doesn't hit Mopsie,

21:33

but it does like they throw themselves

21:35

backwards and like she's on the ground,

21:37

right? Very disoriented

21:39

with what has just happened, but it

21:41

did draw some attention

21:43

that away. So henchman number

21:46

one is headed that way to investigate.

21:48

Flopsie's heading over to help up Mopsie

21:50

and be like, what the, what was

21:53

that? Oh, and went after I noticed

21:55

all them looking at me, I say,

21:57

yeah, I'm here for. Street

22:00

light repair Okay,

22:04

sorry just to clarify and this is

22:06

trying to get the access panel. Okay, just

22:08

so you're shank Yeah, I got access to

22:10

prayer. So you First

22:13

of all, it's like 2 o'clock in the morning

22:18

Electricity doesn't sleep and I can't either

22:20

you can't sleep at all. I Don't

22:24

sleep. We're sure. I mean as a

22:26

server sweetheart. I understand and To

22:29

fix the street like you had to buy

22:31

it from The

22:33

access panels man. Okay. Yes.

22:35

Um, okay. Give me a 2d8

22:37

unless you have something that makes this very Believable

22:41

give me a 2d8 and is it's gonna

22:44

be a tough one Justin Here

22:52

we go, big eight nope There's

22:54

a three. That's right Justin. That's That's

22:58

a fail Yeah,

23:00

that's a failure. Yeah. Now you do

23:02

get to mark a point in your

23:04

experience, you know advancement points Yeah, it

23:06

makes perfect, dude Point

23:09

mark mark and flops

23:11

he is gonna come charging at

23:13

you Wow,

23:18

okay. Well, they're

23:20

a bad person No,

23:23

I know Travis just they had like

23:26

a I like but luckily they do

23:28

miss you on both both of those

23:30

were misses So

23:33

the battle has commenced now so

23:35

far The only

23:37

well cotton tails pretty aware of

23:40

Roger at yeah, but the

23:42

only one they're dancing trap Okay.

23:45

Yeah in the beautiful mind dance Hinchman

23:48

one and two are also going

23:50

to move in to you

23:54

Lyle so henchman one An

23:59

eight does hit So you're

24:01

going to take one point of damage from them and henchmen

24:03

to another hit.

24:05

So you're taking two points of damage because

24:08

you don't currently have any natural

24:10

armor. Now,

24:12

Navy, since you are

24:15

still undiscovered and undercover, is

24:17

you're trying to act. And

24:19

you can act and then once you're

24:21

engaged or whatever you do, take

24:24

a surprise around if you wish. Okay,

24:26

cool. So I am going to use a Mondo

24:29

move. I

24:32

think in this scenario, the most important thing is

24:34

not even my life. It

24:38

is that these precious

24:40

cultural treasures, these

24:42

relics of the Greenback Guardians cannot be

24:45

stolen. So I am going to use Torpedo.

24:47

When submerged in water, Navy Seal can launch

24:50

himself at a foe, a tremendous speed, closing

24:52

large gaps and dealing huge damage. I'm going

24:54

to say not a foe. I'm

24:56

going to charge up the splash pack,

24:58

this huge Aqua Jet pack I have

25:00

on my back and

25:03

I'm going to launch myself

25:05

like a missile from God at

25:08

just the side of the truck. Oh,

25:11

a lot. Okay, give me a 48 roll

25:13

against the truck. That's

25:18

an 8, 7, 8, 4, I

25:20

think double eights. What you've got

25:22

right there? That's a Mega

25:24

Cowabunga, my friend. Yeah, my friend.

25:26

That's very good. That's the best thing you

25:28

can get in this game. Yeah, it works.

25:32

And so you

25:34

impact the truck. I shout

25:36

as I fly towards the area, you'll

25:38

munch blubber. Yeah,

25:43

I love that. You slam

25:45

into the truck in such a way

25:47

that your naturally protective blubber takes the

25:49

impact so you don't take any damage

25:52

from this, but you hit it perfectly,

25:54

right? So that the connection that connects

25:56

the cab of the truck with the

25:59

cargo area. Snaps loose.

26:02

Oh, nice. Right? So right now, there

26:04

would be no way for them

26:07

to haul that away unless it is repaired.

26:09

Yeah. And the truck nuts

26:11

just go flying. The truck nuts go flying.

26:13

Like they fly and they snap up against

26:15

the front door. Oh, stop. You're

26:17

making me nauseous. Normally, it would be funny,

26:21

but in this circumstance, because of the

26:23

severity of the situation and the mistakes,

26:25

it's kind of scary that the truck

26:27

nuts are flying so violently. That

26:30

was the added effect of that move,

26:32

the intimidation factor. Well, the and is

26:35

you didn't take damage. It's not just damage,

26:37

but broken. And Hinchman 3

26:39

is so surprised by this impact. He was

26:41

moving over, but he is like knocked down.

26:43

Nice. So you can act on

26:45

him as well. Hmm.

26:51

We haven't really discussed the

26:54

level of violence. We

26:57

are willing. To bring

26:59

to bear. Yeah. I mean, I think

27:03

here's where I'm at. Axolotl's

27:06

got to be able to lose limbs. But

27:09

I don't think there's got to be blood. No.

27:12

So what I'm thinking is no

27:15

blood. No blood. No blood

27:17

is real. No blood. No fat. Lots

27:20

of getting knocked out. Okay. But you can

27:22

lose limbs. Yeah. I mean,

27:24

like you can. You can

27:26

get sliced up and stuff, but like you

27:28

just it never bleeds. There's no blood. Don't

27:31

worry about any blood. Okay. Everybody's

27:33

very blase. Hinchman 3 is just laying down on the ground. I'm

27:35

just going to like sort of walk. Not

27:37

laying down. Don't make it sound like he

27:39

just taking a nap. He fell back. Yeah,

27:42

but he's prone, right? He's down. He's on the

27:44

ground. Yeah. I'm just going to walk

27:46

over here to start checking out the situation and then just very casually just

27:48

kind of lay down on him. Just kind

27:50

of very casually just sort of flop

27:53

over to the side like I'm just slayer. Because you're

27:55

a big. I'm hopping into onto the onto the love

27:57

seat at the end of a long day at work

27:59

like that. that energy of casualness.

28:03

Yeah, and you've got the skill of bulky boy.

28:05

Yes, that is true. So

28:08

give me a 3d8 roll. Oh,

28:13

that's bad, that's worse. I got double ones on

28:15

that one. A

28:17

one, two, one. Yeah, you go, but

28:19

you sit down upon him, but

28:22

you maybe sit down in kind of an awkward

28:25

way and you end up rolling backwards. Yeah.

28:28

So now the two of you are kind of laying prone

28:30

next to each other. As the

28:33

one observes the other one, like, what's this?

28:35

This is nice. That's

28:37

weird. I landed on my keys. Oh

28:40

no, I hate when that happens,

28:42

man. Justin,

28:52

Justin, what's going on with my business? What's

28:54

going to happen? People ask me this every

28:56

day. Hi, I'm Justin McRory, paid spokesperson for

28:58

NetSuite. People are always asking what's going to

29:00

happen with their business. And I don't know,

29:03

I'm not a magician or a sous-seir or

29:05

a cleric or a clairvoyant. That's what I

29:07

meant to say. But you know who is?

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29:12

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29:37

basically future telling. How is NetSuite able

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to offer this kind of magic? I

29:42

don't know. That's not

29:44

my problem. But you

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can see for yourself

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if you're interested. Download

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29:57

That's netsuite.com/AdventureZone. is

40:00

the healthiest. Um... No,

40:03

let's... no. Let's start off... You do a quick

40:05

vet check. Get a doctor in here. You put

40:07

a thermometer. Hey, guys. Make

40:09

sure none of them have any kind of, like, heart irregularities

40:11

that this kind of shot is. What

40:14

about your family history? There might be some...

40:16

I sort of... Mopsie. Let's go with Mopsie.

40:18

No, uh... no, Cottontail. He

40:21

started with Cottontail. Let's go on with Cottontail.

40:23

I would love to continue the trend of

40:25

Dad accidentally electrocuting and killing an NPC the

40:28

first handful of episodes of the game. Well,

40:30

this is non-lethal shocking. Okay, cool.

40:33

Yeah, non-lethal wet shocking. It's funny

40:35

shocking. With the combination of the

40:37

soaking wet fur and the

40:40

tasers here, you

40:42

are going to knock Cottontail

40:45

out for at least around, if not

40:47

more. We'll see how well they do.

40:50

Now, Mopsie gets some

40:52

of it and is definitely not looking as hale

40:54

and hardy as they were before. Mopsie

40:57

is able to dampen the impact of it.

40:59

You got rubber soles. Yeah, rubber soled shoes.

41:04

Big, rabbit-sized rubber soled shoes.

41:07

So, they are looking

41:09

untouched by this. Let's

41:12

see. Next is you, Lyle. You

41:15

got one more henchman on you, the other

41:17

henchman currently unconscious. Yeah,

41:20

so you just got the one henchman. I'm

41:22

going to... I

41:25

got to heal myself. I'm going

41:27

to... Which of my limbs am

41:29

I missing? How many

41:32

limbs does an axolotl start with? Well,

41:35

when a mommy axolotl and a daddy axolotl...

41:38

I actually don't know if that is... You know... Okay,

41:41

wait, hold on. You know that you can put iodine

41:43

in an axolotl to turn it into a salamander, but

41:45

you don't know how many legs it's got? Four, man.

41:48

And the tail and the head. That's six limbs. And

41:50

the tail and the head. That's six limbs. Okay. I'm

41:53

going to say that your

41:55

tail has been

41:57

damaged in this fight. That

42:00

is where we are seeing the bulk of your damage. OK,

42:04

I would like to heal. Heal

42:08

my tail. OK, so you're

42:10

currently missing how many hit points? Five.

42:13

OK. Give me a roll

42:17

of let's see here. Yeah, give me a

42:19

three to eight roll and we'll see how

42:21

effectively you recover those hit points. OK.

42:27

Oh, no. Oh, beans. Well,

42:30

those are those are three failures. How busted

42:32

is the tail that comes out? How

42:35

busted and wrong is that? I don't even

42:37

know what happens, Trav. The

42:40

the tail just kind of as you're trying to push

42:42

it out. You're

42:45

making the noise, the whatever your

42:47

basic noise for a single limb

42:50

is. OK. And the henshons like

42:52

looking at you and

42:54

curious, waiting to see what happens and

42:57

nothing happens. And there's a

42:59

look of concern on the henshons

43:01

phase that just doesn't sit right with

43:04

you at all. It

43:06

doesn't make you feel good about yourself or your

43:08

abilities. OK. But you

43:10

do. Hey, practice makes perfect,

43:12

dude. That's a second point

43:14

of advancement. OK, but no

43:16

healing has taken. No, sadly, no healing

43:18

has taken place. You might

43:20

have suffered more emotional damage. And the

43:22

henshons says, listen, man, I'm going to

43:24

try to hit you again. But are

43:27

you OK? Hey,

43:31

that's actually so cool. Thank

43:33

you for checking out me. Yeah, I'm I'm

43:37

I've been better. I mean, I feel like I'm

43:39

learning a lot today. Oh, sorry about this. And

43:41

they punch you for one more point of damage.

43:44

Nerds. Up

43:46

next is Henshin 3. We only have eight hit points,

43:49

right? Yeah. So

43:51

Lyle's almost cashed in,

43:53

cashed in his chips. Yeah, three

43:56

quarters of those hit points are

43:58

Henshin number three. sitting on

44:00

top of you says, or you're sitting on top of

44:02

him, says, uh, listen,

44:05

I just wanted to say, even

44:07

though you're squishing me and

44:10

it's like my job to stop

44:13

you. I just wanted to say, thank

44:16

you for your service. Oh, uh,

44:19

sorry. I should make clear I

44:21

am not, nor have I ever been an

44:23

active duty service member in our armed forces.

44:27

Maybe you heard why do you call yourself a

44:29

Navy Oh, um,

44:31

well, I didn't actually know about

44:34

that being a thing when my color

44:36

was assigned to me. I was a

44:39

member of the Royal seals. You're familiar

44:41

with them. I hope. And, um, so

44:44

I was, they punch you twice. You lose two

44:46

points. Um, and

44:48

with it being a two successes on the, I'm

44:50

also going to say like you, you

44:52

get not quite knocked off of them, but

44:55

knocked back enough. So it's like maybe your legs

44:57

are over them still, but they're able to like

44:59

breathe again and they start to try to get

45:01

up. Okay. But you are up. It's

45:04

your turn there. Navy seal. I, as

45:07

they're standing up, I look

45:10

at them enraged and hurt.

45:12

And I say, I have

45:14

nothing but the utmost respect for,

45:17

for our brave heroes, finding

45:20

our important wars overseas. It

45:23

just kind of sounds like a practice response

45:25

to somebody asking you. Well, I've had to

45:27

say it a bunch of times and I

45:29

blast him full force with the, with the

45:31

splash pack, double barrel. Give

45:34

me three to eight five,

45:36

seven, four, two successes. Yeah.

45:39

Yeah. Yeah. He goes flying backwards,

45:41

bonks against the back of the

45:43

truck. You hear a, you're

45:46

a and he is not unconscious. Flopsy

45:49

is going to take a

45:51

big old kick swing at you

45:53

there, Mac, Roger. Oh

45:55

geez. Oh boy. That's

45:58

three successes of five or seven. I'll

54:00

have this looking shiny and new. Carver

54:02

comes over and give

54:06

me all three of you. And

54:08

if you have anything that gives

54:10

benefits to this, you're trying to

54:12

check his body language, see what

54:14

you can tell from this look

54:17

that he's giving this statue. I

54:19

got double successes, a six-six, a bunga. Yeah,

54:21

with that double success, you

54:23

can see the look that crosses

54:26

through his eyes, the body language.

54:28

He's staring up this statue of

54:30

himself that is him, but at

54:32

least 20 years younger. The

54:35

Greenback Guardians haven't been seen, but this was

54:37

probably modeled after like, you know,

54:39

25 years younger. And here

54:42

stands before you a hero

54:44

in their, at least mid-50s. And

54:48

there is nostalgia mixed

54:50

with kind of sorrow, mixed with like a certain

54:52

amount of loss that you

54:54

can see in his life. Oh, that is

54:56

completely lost on me. So tell me real

54:58

quick, in Greenback Guardians Surf the Moon, it

55:02

seems like there was a little bit of tension happening

55:04

between you and Lamar. And a lot of people were

55:06

saying like, maybe it was happening off

55:08

camera too, and that you guys are sort of building off

55:10

of that. And I'm like,

55:12

no way, these are best friends for life. That

55:15

is just how good of actors they are. Do

55:18

you have anything that I can take back to the

55:20

fan page? Well,

55:23

not, okay. Once again, not to the fan

55:25

page. Quiet, secret quiet. Okay.

55:30

Let's see, which one was that, Surf the Moon you said? Yeah,

55:33

Greenback Guardians Surf the Moon. Oh yeah,

55:35

Lamar was being a jerk about like it

55:37

was a craft service thing, where

55:39

he was like, you ate all the Twizzlers. And

55:41

I was like, I don't even like Twizzlers. And

55:44

yeah, that went on for like six weeks. God,

55:46

you're amazing. Mr.

55:48

Carter, yes, Lyle had a question. Carver,

55:50

Carver. Lyle had a question. All

55:53

right, where are the other guys? Right

55:56

around two. I mean, I'm sure they're somewhere. I

55:58

haven't talked to those dudes. in, uh,

56:00

let me check. Yeah. 20 years. Oh,

56:03

well, why did you pop

56:05

up here? And now just to get your back

56:08

to get slugger. Yeah, man. He's

56:11

been bouncing around in like

56:13

private collections and all

56:15

this stuff. I had no idea where it was. And then

56:17

I saw the news report and they

56:19

said that our signature items were going to be. And so

56:21

like, I was like, Oh, I better go get slugger. I

56:23

bet he misses me. Um, I

56:25

missed him. Well, can we

56:27

have the other ones or no, man,

56:30

long in a museum. They

56:33

belong. That shouldn't that work? He's here

56:35

and he's can do anything he wants.

56:38

He's still okay. Above the law. You

56:40

guys know what? I don't think it's

56:42

right. I think, I

56:44

think you should put it back, man. Okay.

56:48

Do you? Yeah,

56:50

I might agree with Lyle. I

56:53

think, you know, it's, you

56:55

know, you guys have been, you put in a

56:58

lot of work and we're all really

57:00

grateful, but we've been the

57:02

ones cleaning things up around here lately. And I

57:04

don't see why you just waltz in here. Let

57:07

us do all the hard work and then you

57:09

take the bath. Okay. So

57:11

just to be clear, right? Um,

57:14

I'm looking at you. You say

57:16

you've been cleaning up the streets

57:18

and everything. So are you guys

57:20

in fibophores or codename bird or,

57:22

uh, the Royal fields? I'm former

57:24

force. Uh, we, we had some

57:27

differences. Uh, uh, but you

57:30

know, I'm, I'm, I'm figuring things out.

57:32

I've, I've heard from them, uh,

57:35

a few times, spin

57:37

a little bit, but you know, I'm

57:39

so kind of off and on, I

57:41

guess off and on. That's why, yeah,

57:43

I mean off and on. And I'm

57:45

still in my 90 day probationary period

57:47

with the organization. So I, I've

57:50

been operating as kind of a

57:52

lone cow on my own. Um, uh,

57:55

just recently joined these two.

57:58

I was a Royal. seal before

58:01

I was dishonorably discharged from the

58:03

royal seals not the actual military

58:05

which I've never been got it

58:08

I don't know

58:10

why they gotta see discharge so

58:14

you guys aren't even like a real team okay

58:16

got it yeah um hold on I'm

58:19

gonna go wait wait wait wait

58:21

wait in

58:25

um in greenback guardian's pepperoni

58:27

slumber party yeah

58:30

it seemed like the romance

58:33

arc that was happening between you and

58:35

Kylie Minogue's character it

58:37

felt like that also was real behind

58:39

camera and I was also just wondering

58:41

if you could spill the tea but if you had

58:43

an off off-screen romance with Kylie

58:45

Minogue during the making of that motion picture

58:49

not during the making of it no what

58:52

are the other signature items that are

58:54

here uh we have carver's back we've

58:57

got tomorrow has a spiked shield loveless

59:00

is hook and chain just a

59:03

new and newtons an

59:06

envelope of voice and newtons

59:08

was a boomerang so

59:11

a boomerang a spiked shield and a hook

59:13

and chain okay I'm

59:15

gonna uh uh pick over

59:17

uh walk over and pick up the hook

59:19

and chain but hey what

59:21

do you know no that's

59:24

loveless what I thought we were we're

59:26

all having some fun here right all

59:30

right you know what you know what

59:32

I'll make you guys a

59:35

deal let's

59:37

put our stuff down first though right you

59:41

put your stuff down I'm

59:43

I start swinging the hook now

59:47

you don't know me my

59:49

name's actually Lyle I'm an

59:52

extreme firefighter and

59:54

if you're wondering if I'm gonna be able

59:57

to hit this shot with this hook and

59:59

this rope I've

1:00:01

hit way longer on way smaller

1:00:03

toe holds partner. Okay.

1:00:07

All right. I toss the hook at

1:00:09

the bat. Whoa. Okay.

1:00:13

Let's do this. And he throws

1:00:15

off his coat, and you can just

1:00:17

see, though he is in his 50s,

1:00:20

still quite in shape. Scars

1:00:22

across his body, armored

1:00:26

underneath his coat, and

1:00:29

he squares off for a fight. It's

1:00:32

not fair that you didn't take that off before

1:00:34

we fought. Okay. And

1:00:36

I Flag. ETA Epic

1:00:58

Hey kids, Sergeant Salamander

1:01:01

here with another Amphibaphack

1:01:03

from the Amphibaphores. Ever

1:01:27

jumped off the last step on your way to get

1:01:29

to school? Well, over

1:01:31

90% of stair-related injuries occur on

1:01:33

the last step of the staircase.

1:01:37

Why put your foot in your mouth when you could stay

1:01:39

on your toes? Let's hang

1:01:41

10 on that last step every

1:01:43

time and your heel turn will

1:01:45

stay flat-footed. Ankles!

1:01:54

Maximum Fun. A worker-owned

1:01:57

network of artist-owned shows. Supported,

1:01:59

direct.